Mechanical

The moment you decide to binge, it's like your mind stops working. All you can think about is stuffing your face full of food, any food. The more unhealthy, the better.

Your jaw hurts from chewing so much, and your stomach is bulging out. You ache from all the food inside you. There has to be a way to get it out of you! There has to be a way to stop feeling like such a failure. And you think "There is..." So you head to the bathroom, sink down to your knees, and stick your finger(s) down your throat and regurgitate all that food inside you. You do this until all that comes out is water tainted with blood.

Now your throat hurts from all that purging, you're dizzy from loosing all those nutrients so fast, the smell of vomit sticking to you.

You crawl into bed and wish to waist away, never wanting this to happen again, but, like always, it does.

Your movements are mechanical.